Elvis Presley
And I'm not talking the "Ed Sullivan Show" Elvis; I mean the beglittered, Vegas, gimme-a-sammich Elvis. A little less conversation, a little more action please. Shouldn't that be the Super Bowl's motto?

Because he's, well, dead, I'm thinking Elvis would be a showstopper. If he can't be resurrected or summoned off the beaches of Belize, then a giant hologram or digitally projected Elvis probably would work too.