My failure to be self centered for maybe the first time in my life turned out to be the blessing of all time for me. I let go, I opened my heart, soul, and home to someone in need of all of those things, along with all the parenting skills and patience I could muster......my teen foster son came, with his whirlwind of problems and hangups, and turned our lives upside down, brought us what we thought at the time was misery and despair, which in the end turned out to be my biggest blessing. He has shown me his dysfunction, his addictions and his lonliness and longing to be with his family, but at the same time learned to trust me and my decisions for his life. Although not always to his liking, he has learned also to realize my boundaries were not there to hurt him, but in fact keep him safe until he is old enough and mature enough to do this for himself. So failing to think of myself has been my greatest undoing...I highly recommend it.