Cops on bicycle

My camera. I will see the most interesting photo op ever and won't be able to take a picture. My future career as a professional photographer will be over before it started.

My phone. I will be stranded out in the middle of nowhere in the middle of the night and won't be able to call for help. (Never mind that I don't actually go out to the middle of nowhere in the middle of the night, or any other time.)

My wallet, with my driver license. It will be the one time I get pulled over for going the speed limit.

My reading glasses. I won't be able to read the fine print on the ticket I'm getting for going the speed limit. By signing the ticket, I will be agreeing to switch my phone carrier for a more expensive plan where I can only call someone in the middle of the night from the middle of nowhere.