Food eating contests are a form of racism. There. I've said it.

Oh, let's shove 12 hot dogs down our throats in as little time as possible. It's loads of fun. Harmless fun.

Is it? Have you ever thought about how the hot dog feels to be treated this way? Being treated like nothing more than a piece of meat (surrounded by some bread). Of course you haven't thought about it. You're far too selfish.

Hey guys! Let's eat a massive pie! It will be well funny. We'll get cherries all over our faces and the juice will be all over our shirts. It's going to be a riot.

No. No, it isn't. Grow up.

I don't have a problem with people eating food, but for god's sake, let's not make a sport out of it. It's totally barbaric.