- This is in answer to:
- Describe in great detail, your ultimate escape plan. See all answers
- February 27, 2013 by hibernationnow
- My Great Secret Escape
Shhh! This is top secret so don't tell anyone about this plan. It's just between you and me, don't forget it. Remember that dull party that is planned every Spring? The one with over 200 people that you know and enjoy and I don't know anyone? Yes, that one. Every time I go with you, you leave me alone and start patting the backs of other guys, drinking your red wine and your bottles of beer and I am left sitting at an empty table pretending to smile, drinking my soda or cranberry juice.Or, I just walk around the room looking like a lost soul. As soon as I see food coming out of the kitchen I eat as many of the appetizers as I can because as we all know, those are the best. I've learned where the kitchen doors open and where the waiters and waitresses come out and I position myself carefully. I love those bite size appetizers, I would never leave before I had my fill of those delicate little flaky morsels. Sometimes they have crab meat ragoon inside them, tender and moist, jumbo shrimp with cocktail sauce, teriyaki chicken or pigs in a blanket which I dunk in creamy mustard.There are always a wide assortment of appetizers, fresh vegetables with a dill yogurt sauce, a large fruit salad, the bright red strawberries gleam with pride, four or five different wedges of cheese and assorted crackers, hummus, pita chips and a sushi bar.
It is after this period, before they serve the dreary buffet dinner with people waiting in long lines that I plan my escape. No one is looking at me anyway so it really isn't risky. I slip out of the basement room which is extremely crowded and if anyone is around me I murmur that I am going to the bathroom. Anyone who knows me, knows that I do that often anyway. I climb the brown velvet steps, I have my beige cardigan around me ( wearing nothing flashy on purpose) and I step outside into the cool Spring air.
We have come in two cars so I hand the ticket to the attendant, slip him a crisp 5 dollar bill, smile and drive away. The restaurant/banquet hall is so busy tonight because it's on a weekend. I happen to know that they are always busy on weekends, every single weekend when they are booked for weddings as well; I plan well.
I start driving, my suitcase is already loaded in the trunk, there's a brown paper bag filled with clear bags of almonds and raisins, diet orange soda, small bottles of Pellegrino, four ham and cheese sandwiches on rye with Hellmann's mayonnaise and Lay's baked potato chips. For dessert I have purchased a big pack of softly baked chocolate chip cookies that I bought at Costco, you can imagine the size of that bag!
I have CD's in the car, and no where in particular to go, I love that feeling. I just drive, I have no idea where I am going and where I will end up. It really doesn't matter, does it? I'm alone, free, with no responsibilities, no one to put me down. I go from one bridge to tunnel to highway and I don't fuss because I am lost. I'm not lost. I'm free. I open the window halfway, put on the radio and sing out loud. I don't know where I'm going and that is the plan. Wherever I end up will be the place I choose, for a short time, that is, until I decide it's time to go again. I love the feeling, living for me, just me, on the road with nothing to hold me back. The gas tank is full, I'm just following the stars and singing out loud, no one complaining that my voice is off-key. This is my kind of adventure, no one telling me what to do or where to go. Maybe I'll adopt a dog and tie a red bandana around its neck. That would make it perfect. Me and my dog on a journey to nowhere yet everywhere.