I was maybe 8 years old and spending the summer with my grandmother in Portugal. She lived in a small one-theater town. American movies were a big event and advertised with badly translated posters hanging in the town square.

I was very excited when Flash Gordon came to town.

I was even MORE excited when it turned out to be FLESH Gordon.

We only made it through about 15 minutes of the movie before Grandma yanked me out of the theater, but OMG, that was the most jiggly boob-filled 15 minutes of my 8 year-old life.