If I believed in hell, I would surely go there for this.

It was, quite simply, the greatest thing that had ever happened to me up to that point. Unfortunately, her little brother was also in the van, and reported everything back to their mother. Next Sunday in church was a little bit awkward as both mothers tried to posthumously instill us with shame. My teenage hormones resisted.

Eventually we recovered and lived to kiss another day. And in the spirit of my idealistic, "stick it to the man", 16 year-old self, later that year I felt her up in the church sanctuary during a youth group lock-in. Take that, God!