I had this boyfriend in high school who everyone thought was just fantastic. He was tall and goofy and had enormous ears, but he had a pretty great personality and was known as a NICE guy. So when he started being a shitty boyfriend and treating me like crap and then broke up with me and was even more of a jerk, nobody really believed me. And I still had to hear all the time what a NICE GUY that Dan was.

I was really angry, so as punishment I made him take me to my prom. I had a terribly sucky time, which I realize was my own fault. Dan was a couple years older than me, but he knew everyone in my class, so he normally would have had a terrific time. I made sure he didn't though and went out of my way to make sure he stuck by my miserable side all night while I glared at him.

At least our pictures came out really nice, I will say we made an attractive couple. Well... as attractive as you can get when one of you looks like Dumbo.


UPDATE: Dan has since converted to Jehovah's Witnessism and married a fellow Jehovah. Sometimes he goes knocking on my mom's door and bugs her.