Computers are fucking evil. Because of them, I now believe the assassinations of Honest Abe and JFK were government conspiracies and 9/11 was an inside job. Not because the internet has shown me some smoking gun (it hasn't) but because I now know the dickishness of people knows no bounds.

Fuck what Wikipedia says. Computers were originally created to piss off the population so severely that we had no other alternative but to rape and kill each other and then feast on the flesh of God's greatest mistake. At least, that's the urge they instill in me.

How would I go without a computer for a month? Quite fucking happily, to be honest. I've been doing it for the past month (hence the lack of the updates you've come to rely on to get you through your day) and I can't tell you how happy I was without it.

As soon as I got it back I snapped. I started losing sleep. I punched small animals. If I had a girlfriend, I would have ended her.

Everyone one of you would be able to turn to your family during the evening news and say "Hey! I know that guy!" And one of you would be able to feel guilty about not making that coffee trip before I got locked away for life.

...God I fucking hate computers.