If I could relive any day of my life, it would be the day I got married – I wouldn't have shown up.

Harrison, NY Train Wreck

The day I got married...I wouldn't have shown up.

Your wedding day is supposed to be the happiest, most looked forward to day of your life…isn’t it? Maybe for some that’s how it works out, but for me it was a day from hell – and that was just the beginning. When I saw my wedding photos of me walking down the aisle, I was as white as a ghost, and I remember feeling terrified.

I’d always been afraid to get married and had been engaged a few times before, but I thought because I started going to church and found someone through the congregation that I was pretty much guaranteed a happy and long lasting marriage.

Little did I realize that the church was more of a cult and the so-called husband was a certified psychotic – and everyone in his family knew it.

The reception was a potluck where the church folk sat on one side of the room and family sat on the other. These church folk didn’t believe in dancing, so even my first dance was uncomfortable – and the discomfort didn’t end there. His mother was overheard at the reception to say, “Well, he’s her problem now.” Even my stepfather had some insightful advice for me at the reception when he took me aside and said, “I don’t give this marriage 6 months.” How did he know?

Maybe it was the reason I was getting married at the age of 28 – to stop people from pressuring me, like my mother since I was 20 and those who looked down on me for being a single parent, like the church. It worked really well in the end, but it cost me $400 to get out of it 6 months later, plus the cost of tranquilizers from having my life threatened.

Well, nobody pressures me about getting married anymore and at 54 I’m just starting to think that I’m ready for it.