• IntegratedMan
      • hello Clay
      • Username: IntegratedMan
      • In response to: "What is the one thing you consistently spill on yourself?" Beef stew. Rich, yummy with lots of beef on the bone and tons of veggies!
  • IntegratedMan's latest answers
    • Family ritual #1: Sharing the bathroom
      • Sharing the bathroom
        Since my sons were babies we have always made our personal hygiene a team event: baths together etc. Even though they are now older and growing into young men, the ritual persists. Every evening before bed, we congregate in the master bath. One will be sitting on the throne, flossing teeth and reading a magazine. The other will be in the shower and I will be busy shaving and trimming nose hairs. We talk about important things, settle issues and goof off splashing each other.


      • answered by IntegratedMan on 07/28/2009
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    • The Skunk Adventure
      • Wet Baby Skunk

        Whoa! Just reading the prompt gave me goose bumps and a hearty anxiety attack!
        I was only 2 years old sitting in front of the TV and the announcer was in tears talking about JFK’s assassination…. Wait! That can’t be. Would I really remember that moment if I were only 2 years old!?
        When I was 4 years old I had a recurring dream in which an arm reached down through the ceiling and…. Wait! Let’s leave that one for the therapist’s couch.
        I’m going to take a rain check on the whole first memory issue, too disturbing, but I will share an early memory:
        I remember living in Greeley Hill, California for a while. My father, uncle and grandfather worked at a job that required boots with spiked soles. They left dents and small holes in the wooden floor in the kitchen. One morning, very early, my father roused us all from a deep sleep. There was a smell in the house that could make cheese curdle. We were ushered outside. A light snow had fallen during the night. We stood around watching my father crawling around looking under the small house. He moved barrels and stacks of wood. He banged on the side of the house and cursed the culprit who had dared to disturb our morning. Finally, a small furry animal, jet black with a pair of white stripes running down the center of his back, ran out from under the house sending the lot of us screaming and dashing for cover. My siblings and I were enjoying the moment and giggling with delight. Finally, the little skunk ran into the woods leaving us with the scent of his visit. We opened all the windows and doors to let the cool, fresh morning air restore livability to our home. My mother fried bacon and whipped up pancakes and the adventure with the skunk was told repeatedly from different perspectives as we drank milk and stuffed our little faces….

      • answered by IntegratedMan on 07/21/2009
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    • ET Partnership
      • Easy I would give them high-def, widescreen editions of "Invasion of the Body Snatchers" and "War of the Worlds". This would provide them with all the information they need to rid our world of war, government and illness. They would take over and fix everything.

        Don't worry, I wouldn't leave you living in captivity. After cleaning up the planet and abolishing all pain and suffering, they would fall ill with the latest version of the Swine Flu. To receive proper medical attention, the aliens would restore our capability to think independently. They would also participate in the newly established universal (gives the word a whole new meaning) health care plan.

        After being nursed back to health by an international team of earth’s best medical professionals, the aliens would thank us with an economic miracle: The alien philosophy encourages buying property at prices way above market value. One half of their civilization buys up all the homes that are valued at only half of what the bank is owed. The other half took over the government owned banks and makes a huge profit. They split the difference and everyone [thing?] wins.

        Eventually, the world economy recovers, peace reigns in every corner of the world and we learn to coexist and celebrate our differences…. aliens and humans alike.

      • answered by IntegratedMan on 07/17/2009
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    • A gift from Japanese Massage wouldn't be bad
      • If you've ever experienced a Japanese massage then you understand why I talk about it here. A massage may begin with all clothing still on, but be prepared to expose every vulnerable point of your physical attire. That's exactly what will be explored while being massaged simultaneously. Japanese massage is unlike Western massage in the fact that it relies on pressure points to cure ailments, as well as to soothe mind, body and soul.

      • answered by IntegratedMan on 07/13/2009
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