I have an official, unofficial list in my head of what I value most in friends

*They obey the "no asshole" rule
*Always honest
*Able to handle sarcasm and sexual references

I made up my mind a year ago that I wouldn't let people treat me like shit. This of course meant cutting people out of my life, and by cutting them out I mean avoiding them like the plague AT ALL COSTS. What's great about the friends I have is that we can go through periods of not talking and be able to pick up where we left off. And not having to have the "why haven't you called me" conversation which I also try to avoid like the plague. I put always honest on my list because I've been experiencing a lot of passive aggressive behavior lately, and I don't fucking like it. I view that as being dishonest. Just because you put a side smiley face at the end of a sentence does not take the hidden meaning out of your douche comments =). If you feel that I am being an asshole just come out and say it so that I can call you one back and we can move on with out lives. And of course my ultimate favorite quality in any person really is the ability to handle sarcasm and sexual comments, even better if they can dish it out themselves. So many times I have wasted witty jokes on people who don't appreciate the true awesomeness.

You know how some men buy really expensive cars to make up for certain, well, shortages? Well, I don't even own a car…

blue birds, blue birds fly

The best scare I have is the one on my left hand. When I was little I thought it would be a really good idea to place with a broke mirror that was propped up against the wall. I quickly realized I should have just played with my legos when the mirror came crashing down directly in the path of my little defenseless baby arm. Long story short the scare looks like a bird flying away. Like the kind of birds you draw flying away when you were asked to draw a pretty picture in second grade.I wounder how many years of bad luck is equivalent to almost losing a limb to a broke mirror.

pollen-1

It feels like death. When ever the seasons change I either get the worst cold or have to deal with allergies. So while everyone is running around in the warm sun I am making deals with the devil to make myself feel better. Especially when the weather wants to be bipolar and wont make up her mind if she wants to be hot or cold. No problem weather, you can continue being an asshole I'll just stay rolled up in a ball waiting for it to be over.