• Oblivion
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      • Username: Oblivion
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    • Knees, hives and time machines.

      • Time Machine Promotional Poster 2008 (Design - Neil Parry)

        1. Shake with pure unadulterated fear.
        2. Assess the accessibility of the escape route, whilst trying to control the shaking.
        3. Reason with myself that it's only a spider (the size of it is actually irrelevant).
        4. Remind myself that spiders have the spider-equivalent of knees and that anything with knees can technically jump and therefore by extension maul you to death.
        5. Remember random articles on the web about the hive mentality of certain spiders in darkest Peru (or somewhere similar) catching animals in their webs and how evolution might mean that they can hunt people in the future, and of course, the spider in my bedroom is the ring leader of that whole colony of spiders-from-the-future who ran out of future-people to eat so they came back in time to find people like me ...
        6. Remember that not everything you read on the web is true.
        7. Dismiss 6 because 5 is WAY more likely.
        8. Berate myself that my cell phone is not in my pocket, so dialling the emergency services isn't an option.
        9. Look around for something heavy to throw at it and smush it or disable it sufficiently for me to make good my escape, and then remember that I throw like a girl so all I am likely to do is piss it off, and make the inevitable mauling worse.
        10. Accept that being brave is not in my genetic profile, and scream for help.

        Works for me ... kinda ...

        Now if I could only forget the stuff on the web that says we eat about 8 spiders a year in our sleep.

        Oh! and let's not forget the ones that we eat all smushed up in various chocolate bars.

        FML. I hate the web.

      • answered by Oblivion on 11/07/2010
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    • Oh, the horror!

      • Hackney Driving

        "Least favourite" has to make it to that list ... whatever that list really is!

        Let's face it, technically, it means, "This actually makes it onto my favourites list, but it's the very last one on the list" and yet it is used to mean, "I am ambivalent about this" or, more likely, "I don't like this at all" !

        So ... exactly WHERE does all this stuff that you don't like even fit into the sentence, "My least favourite *insert stuff* is *insert more stuff*" ????

        Its usage is so screwy that it loses all meaning if you think about it too hard!

        For example, just to hammer the point home, my least favourite way to eat eggs is probably eggs hollandaise, since I do actually rather like eggs hollandaise ... but eating raw eggs doesn't even qualify as a favourite because it's like eating snot, and since I am truly not a fan of eating snot, I can only say, 'Eating raw eggs is like eating snot, and it makes me want to puke". It certainly doesn't qualify as a 'favourite'.

        So, to answer the question ... my least favourite cliche is probably 'draw a line under it and walk forward' because whilst it's so hackneyed it could probably use a carriage and team to go with it, I use it, I like it and I can be heard saying it in the various corridors of medicority in which I stroll!

      • answered by Oblivion on 11/07/2010
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    • Reading 'The Way of the Peaceful Warrior' opened my eyes

      • This quote:
        Pain is a relatively objective, physical phenomenon; suffering is our psychological resistance to what happens.

        Events may create physical pain, but they do not in themselves create suffering.

        Resistance creates suffering.

        Stress happens when your mind resists what is ... the only problem in your life is your mind's resistance to life as it unfolds.

      • answered by Oblivion on 10/28/2010
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    • If I Were President

      • Constitution of the United States of America

        Separating "church" from State.

        The religious right oppose human rights ... unless those humans happen to be of the same religious views, in which case, fine, they prescribe which human rights are 'right' for a good 'Christian'.

        To quote Gandhi: "I like your Christ, I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ."

      • answered by Oblivion on 10/26/2010
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