• bugsy
      • hello Adam Burrows
      • Username: bugsy
      • In response to: "What is the one thing you consistently spill on yourself?" I consistently spill toothpaste on myself. Every time I put on a shirt, I think "maybe I should brush my teeth first, then put on the shirt - nah, i'll risk it, it'll be fine" - mistake.
  • bugsy's latest answers
    • Making out in Manchester, England

      • Terrible. Would you expect any less?

        I had reason to believe that this chick was my girlfriend - only in as far as 8 year olds can be going out with each other. We hadn't bought a mortgage together if that's the level you're at.

        At a school disco in a church community centre hall, about 50 young and preppy 8 year olds from the local private school rocked up to dance the macarena and get drunk on Haribo.

        Suitably sugared up on cola bottles, I decided it was nigh on time for my first kiss, and went in for the sucker. She responded. Great. I thought that whilst I was still kissing her, failing to notice how extremely pursed and tense our lips had become. It was less of a kiss, and more like pressing your lips onto concrete. But it was still great.

        And then she slapped me. Full on slap. In the middle of Cheadle Hulme Community Centre school disco. Everyone watched it and laughed, she just ran into the girls toilets. It must have been the Haribo I thought, as I continued to macarena.

      • answered by bugsy on 03/27/2009
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    • I demand Chocolate Brownie.

      • This would be my version of 'Bandits'


        Chocolate Brownie.
        "Now look here Officer Dickwad, if i'm gonna think clearly in this situation, and if you don't want blood on your police pension, then you better get me some warm chocolate brownie, stat!"


        Vanilla Ice Cream.
        "Either you must be stupid Officer Dickwad, or we ain't in a hostage situation at a downtown bank. When I said 'warm chocolate brownie', the 'warm' of that sentence implied 'stick a little ball of vanilla on the top or i'm gonna shoot someone."


        My own movie deal.
        "Now look Officer Dickwad, this has been going pretty well so far - we're in a pretty realistic mock hostage situation. How about you get on your phone, make some calls, and let's cut this into a movie? Do it and i'll let them all go."




      • answered by bugsy on 03/27/2009
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    • 'Showgirls' was a bad choice to watch with the family

      • I was 10.

        I started the film by saying "Hey mom, that's the girl from 'Saved by the Bell' - you know, that show I watch on Nickelodeon?!"

        Well Showgirls ain't a Nickelodeon matinee film, let me tell you that much.

        After that night, I didn't speak to them until I was 12.

      • answered by bugsy on 03/06/2009
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    • Chocolate would set your country straight

      • Obama Chocolate Bar

        I'm British - we don't need Barack Obama, we need a good English leader who has a face that looks as if it's been badly moulded out of clay.

        But from the outside looking in - America could use a few more British imports I think.

        Ffffffooorrr instance - you guys have TV which is far too colourful. Reality bites. Put it in greys and pastel colours, cut down on the cartoons, and maybe you won't leave the house and wonder why everything isn't as bright as it looks on the box.

        Next - chocolate. None of that Hershey's crap. Get something real in the shops. Belgian, Swiss, English Truffle chocolates - we know how to make this shit over here - so buy it from us. Chocolate contains Theobromine which makes you happy - aka - anti-depression/recession.

        Finally - a royal family. Can you imagine? "Here comes King Casey of America." Royal families are great - they always look good and you can blame them for stuff that is going wrong with the economy - they will attract way more tourists = good for the economy. All in all they're quite good value for money. I put my name forward for the job please. First things in office, better chocolate and worse TV.

      • answered by bugsy on 03/06/2009
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