- hello Bianca T.
- Username: imeverything09
- In response to: "Who are you?" I am a mother. I am a daughter. I am a sister. I am a girlfriend. I strive to be the best at each of those roles, even though I sometimes fail. There's more to life than being perfect.
- imeverything09's latest answers
- This one goes out to the one I love
There's something about Valentine's Day; maybe it's the romance, or the gifts, or simply seeing the joy on our loved ones faces. There's something undeniable about today. Love it, or hate it, Valentine's Day makes us feel. We may feel passion and desire, or cold and bitter, we may have some one at the front of our minds today, or we may shove the thoughts to the back. Whatever the mood that finds you today, I hope that your spirits are high.
I've never been one to think much of today. It was usually a sad day for me. Much like one of my later posts about Christmas, I harbored unpleasant thoughts towards times when most people were happy. But three and a half years ago, something changed that.
His name is Anthony, and he is the best thing that ever found me. I was at a point then, where I had just learned to love myself. I was 21, had a young baby and wasn't in a good emotinal place. I had spent the best years of my life hating me, and everything around me. But then a friend told me about a guy "I just had to meet!" So I agreed.
I had found a place about 2 months prior in which I had started to like who I had become. I was smart, I thought I was pretty, and for the first time in ever, no ones opinion of me mattered any more. But his opinion...started to matter.
The first second I saw him walking down the stairs of his house, was unreal. Like a slow motion stair case desend in a movie. It was litterally like a fairy tale. There was no way this guy was real. Yet he was, and 4 days later he would become my eveything. We started off fast, and ended up slow, savoring our relationship and watching it grow. Sure there were some rough times, but nothing is perfect. But my Anthony is pretty close.
Who does your mind wander to on this Day of Love?
- Even if I have to stand alone...
I've always had a bit of a rebelious streak. Back as far as I can remember. I always found my soul struggling between two things: the need every human has to be accepted by their peers (especially when I was in high school), and the desire to be myself. This desire was built into me it seems, and follows me through out life.
On one hand, I want to blend in, to go with the popular vote, to swim with the current and let everyone else lead. But on the other, I feel like a salmon. I know I was born to do my own thing. To break out of the mundane everyday thing, and just be me.
It's not always an easy choice, and sometimes (okay, most of the time) I don't choose wisely. But I at least make a choice. So many people I see don't give themselves enough credit. They either don't believe enough in themselves, or they don't believe in there abilities to make a desicion.
Some are scared of being rejected. I am no stranger to that, but I would rather some one hate me for everything I am, than to love me for something I'm not. If I believe in something, I am always going to believe in it. Your opinion won't sway me. I believe those who stand fast and firm, are the ones who are going to bring change. Good, powerful changes. The kind a whole nation can stand by.
But some one has to believe.
What's something you're proud of? Has there ever been a time that you recall stepping out of your shell and stucking up for something or some one? Did it move you? Did those around you look at you a little differently?
Being different is what makes us human. Life would be borng if we were all the same.
- Bah Hum Bug
I don't do emotions. I don't like them, I don't understand them, and most of all I don't want to feel them. Pain is only evident in the absence of pleasure. I'm a firm believer in the fact that if we didn't know joy, we can't understand the void left in its wake. Unfortunately, that's morbid and depressing and my posts have been way too much of each lately. I notice that my muse comes from a different place when I'm upset.
I guess during the holidays I'm not the happiest person. I know I have an earlier post that contradicts that. What ways do you spread cheer when you are less than cheerful?
- Unwinding in A Time of Stress
We all have that one place we go when things get hectic. For some of us, it's the bath tub for a good long soak. It may be behind a locked door with music turned up and the world tuned out. Me I prefer both of those things, together in harmony. Whatever it is you chose to do when things get tough, and wherever it is you go to do it, I'm sure it is a relaxing place. As humans, we naturally crave solace when life gets crazy.
For me, I tend to tune out. I can be anywhere and find comfort inside me. If the rest of the world is just too much, I tune everything else out, and focus on what I need emotionally to get through it, and I do just that. Nothing more, nothing less.
This can be both a blessing and a curse because I come across a lot as aloof. Or people think I'm being rude. But trust me, it would be far more rude for me to tell someone what I think of them than to become distant. Although not everyone shares this point of view.
So tell me, where do you go to unwind? Do you shut down, or do you prefer to spend time with loved ones and have family close when you're going through a difficult time?
- What I Hope to Accomplish
Everyone wants to make a difference in some one else's life. Think about a person who you would like to help or somehow change their course of history for the better. There are many great and noble things one can do to help out a lost soul. From adopting a pet, to helping kids at a school program, to volunteering at a food kitchen (That's the second time this week I've mentioned that. I wonder if I'm feeling guilty?)
There are countless things I can think of that I can do right now, at this very second at little to no cost that could benefit some one else. But I'm not writing about that right now. Right now, I'm thinking of what I can do with my blog to help others. I need to define a goal of how my words can move another person, and hopefully help them for the better.
It may be a silly thought, that my blog could possibly help some one. But I never know, stranger things have happened. My wish for The Thought Nazi is that some one will read what I write and that my words will "move" them. To laughter, to tears, whatever. I don't care. As long as they are not being moved to boredom then I'm alright with it :)
I just want to make a difference, however small in someone's life. What would you do to make some body's life a little better in a small (or not so small) way?