One of my super powers is I can fall asleep in almost any situation if I so desire and sometimes if I simply stop trying to stay awake.

This ability was not seen as super power in my family as it is apparently hard coded into the DNA. My dad used to joke that if he took a Sominex and fell asleep 50% faster, he would fall asleep on the way to his bed.

This usually holds true for me. I used to fall asleep before my husband would come to bed from brushing his death because I closed my eyes and...that is pretty much all it takes most nights.

In fact recently I was very worried when my husband told me it took him 30 minutes or more to fall asleep. "I didn't know you were having insomnia," I said. "I'm not," he replied. If it takes me longer than 10 minutes to fall asleep, I am not going to fall asleep for a long time. I have insomnia.

I have had my share of bouts of insomnia throughout my life. I feel my bouts may have been made all the more frustrating since usually sleep comes so easy. When I can't fall asleep, I feel like crying and screaming.

Usually the thing that keeps me up is some big picture worry, like I am never going to get on the right professional track or what if I never achieve the things I most want in my life. Its things I can't easily fix or talk rationalize away in less than a lifetime.

Even worse than worry is guilt and regret about past actions. It can be as simple as feeling like I said the wrong thing to a friend or as massive as missing a job opportunity. These things are all the more aggravating because I don't know why my brain has to pick the moment I just want to pass out to dredge the depths of my remorse pool for topics to replay and over analyze.

In my moments of insomnia I feel like I have split personalities. One half of me is pondering my failures and missteps unable to let anything go while the other half of me is screaming "let it go and go to sleep!"

I have no idea what causes this divide in my mind and sometimes even that pondering can keep even this super sleeper awake.

It seems as you get older one by one the vices you have must be eradicated. Most of my vices have been tosses out due to doctors or dignity.

When I was younger one of my vices was naps. I would take long, luxurious naps as a teenager. I recall my favorite thing to do was work the morning to afternoon shift, come home and nap from afternoon until after dark, only to get up and join my friends for evening festivities. Though I won't say I never nap anymore, more than a necessary 45 minute nap to recharge my old bones is a rarity. Even 45 minutes naps are rare. I have so much to do, I cannot waste my time asleep.

Another vice I once had was drinking in excess. This was perhaps more a phase. Something I did between the ages of 18 to 22 and it soon dropped away. Though I have made the mistake after 22 of drinking too much and saw how my dignity suffered. I have discarded this vice for health reasons as well.

One of my favorite vices was coffee. In all its delicious and wonderful ways. I still feel like a junkie when it comes to coffee. I smell it and feel instantly happier. I allow myself the rare drink of it and I sense I could fall back into my 4 cup a day habits instantly. I had to give up this vice for health reasons too.

Now my main vice is good food. I will drive across town if I have heard a restaurant is worth it. If you looked at a pie chart of how I spend my money, you'd find a large slice goes to food. Whether it is food I prepare myself or prepared by others I love good food. And while I try and watch what I eat, I also recognize that I have had to give up so many vices in my life. That a little pie isn't as bad for me as the 10 beers I used to drink in college. Better to hold on to one thing I love and appreciate it and celebrate it than push it away one more thing I had to give up. Life must have some pleasures and good food is definitely one of mine.