• philophobia420
      • hello Cyra Burns
      • Username: philophobia420
      • In response to: "What do you do on the side?" ....discover what the fuck it is im supposed to be doing here on earth.....a new sign appears every day
  • philophobia420's latest answers
    • 10 Things That Make Me Happy

      • Noticing peoples little quirks.
        Noticing peoples "oddness" always makes me smile. I guess I don't really know why. Peoples little quirks are what draws me to them first usually.


        Everclear
        This is a band I only listen to when I'm in a good mood so every time I hear an Everclear song I get the bouncy music feeling.


        My Soul Sister
        The only person whos mind runs off the same waves as mine...kick ass


        Weed
        self explanitory


        Unplanned Days
        Where it starts out like a normal whatever routine day and ends up being a kick ass night.


      • answered by philophobia420 on 10/05/2010
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    • The Morning So Far

      • So it's like 3AM and for some reason she just now waking up...again. I think she's kinda out of it. Nikko is laying there and she's realizing that while she was playing "non existent" he stole the entire blanket and now that the bed is on the floor it gets pretty damn cold in that room but she can't help but smile at her lethargic silly puppy snoring softly. Finally she manages to wrestle some blanket away from the big mutt and tries to fall back asleep with no success. She wanders into the kitchen looks for a lighter, settles on a pack of matches and sits at the computer to waste some time while everyone sleeps. Random thoughts, some insightful, some completely meaningless, run endlessly through her mind.

      • answered by philophobia420 on 09/07/2010
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    • What I'd Say to My 16-Year-Old Self

      • we're still young.

        Dear sixteen year old Cyra,
        Its been some time since you've even crossed my mind. Well let me think back and try to remember a little about what you are like. You are slightly reckless but that will grow even greater with you. For a while you'll think that you're whole life has flipped upside down and most of everything in it has been shaken out. You're going to have your heart stomped on a few good times in the next few years but it's all worth the time rather you regret it or not. Don't let that guy at the Joint talk Johnny into buying any Spike Max, Valumes and Coloznapan will become a mixture that you turn to for a while like it and hate it.....Really just go with the flow and things usually work out. No need to say good luck anymore since I already know how this all turns out for you but....I kind of miss you.
        Think of you again soon,
        Cyra

      • answered by philophobia420 on 09/01/2010
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    • One Thing I Learned Recently

      • fuck it, rock it

        You can care about someone all you want..Give them your all and in the end it will never be worth it. In the end they either never cared about you or they say you've changed..they've changed. Everything has changed. Or maybe they've found something bigger and better to move forward to....Maybe this doesn't happen to everyone but to me, yes. Always. For once I'm not even being mellow dramatic. I'm really not. I care about someone, I get fucked over, toyed with, stomped on, thrown away. I quit. I do. That sounds so stupid and superficial but I'm serious. I can't deal with any of that again. I'm just not up for it. There's never gonna be a person who gets me inside and out and loves everything about it. There wont, and if there just so happens to be I refuse to become close with that person because in the end it will all lead up to a huge fall and crash. I don't want it. It's just not worth it to me anymore ya know.

      • answered by philophobia420 on 08/06/2010
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    • What Keeps Me Up at Night

      • What keeps me up at night? Wow, I could go on forever. I guess it depends on the exact time, place, and circumstances.....I guess you would call that "the moment". Lately it would be the thought that all I've been doing for years is wasting my time....Wasting my time on other people who didn't deserve it or on pointless activities. It's like whenever I put some time and effort into caring about another person it ends up going all wrong.

        Thinking about people from my past keeps me up. All the things we did wrong, why their not here anymore, whose fault it is...How much I miss or despise them.

        All the things I regret doing and all the things I know I'm going to do and regret in the future. How I'm going to get out and make it completely on my own.....Being an adult now.... I feel like it's time to really step up and figure out some priorities and morals and I don't know some aspirations.

        I stay up at night missing my past and hating it all at the same time. Counting my blessings and cursing God. Screaming and laughing and crying....Everything I can't do in the presence of everyone else because I have to continue pulling off this, "I'm strong and have everything in my head together" act because apparently if you're not strong and don't have everything in your head together something is definitely wrong with you.

        ...And that brings me to another thing that keeps me up at night, I wonder if I'm completely loosing my mind sometimes. A lot actually. Pretty much every day. Maybe I'm really really insane. Know one seems to ever understand exactly why I'm always so angry. I don't really know. The only way I can describe it is there being rage...Just pure untouched rage locked inside of me going off and my body wont project it out. It's just stuck in there exploding.

        I can really go on and on and on but that's a few of the biggies.
        Sleep well,
        Cyra
        XXOO

      • answered by philophobia420 on 08/02/2010
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