Why?

The band "Why?" writes some of the most incredible lyrics I've ever heard.
"Just another Sunday paddleboat ride
On a manmade lake with another lady stranger
If I remain lost and die on a cross
At least I wasn't born in a manger.
I can sense somewhere right now I'm being prayed for.
Seems like I always arrive on the same shore
From where my sails set, maybe with one less lady
Than my vessel left with, is that a threat?
Oh I've stayed scarce this last year yes,
But be assured in unrest,
I'm unavoidable like death this Christmas.
Is this twisted? Why be upset?
I never said I didn't have syphilis Miss Listless.
hard like the bricks I pound my fists with
I mean she's hard like the bricks that I pound with my fists."
-The Fall of Mr. Fifths

Back Flip

I really wish I were able to do standing backflips. I feel like that would open up a lot of doors for me.

Carl Sagan
At parties he'd straight up drop knowledge on bitches.

Russel Brand
Preferably when he was addicted to crack, heroin, and sex. Gotta have a someone in your posse whose thing is heroin.

Bob Saget
Self-explanatory
http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/2730/rollin-with-saget-from-ilikestuff

Abraham Lincoln's Hat
Absolute necessity.