Glen Smallman - Plinky Answers

I made cool, cool.

2009-04-10T03:11:41-06:00

Seriously, how many times have you said "cool" today?

Little known fact, in 1985, I coined the term "cool".

I didn't think it would take. But check me out. If I'd copyrighted it, I'd be richer than Berlusconi.

There is no such thing as a easy revolution.

2009-04-10T03:06:57-06:00

I buy compact fluorescents. I do. And they make me feel warm on the inside. About as warm as those suckers get. Because if I really wanted to save the environment, I would walk places, eat less meat. But I like it when big corporations and Al Gore tells me that paying a dollar or two more for a lightbulb is saving the planet. It makes me feel like a superhero.

Some kids want to be rockstars. I want to P-Funk.

2009-04-10T03:02:15-06:00

My business card will say something like,

Glen
He'll make you believe in reincarnation.
That George Clinton was reincarnation into a white dude.

Actually, I have a business card like that now.

So maybe I'll just say... um... astronaut. But I don't want to do that spinny-gforce thing. But I will drink tang.

Sleepless in Way to Far Away

2009-04-10T02:56:45-06:00

I wanted to be an astronaut as a kid. This didn't take.

I told her she lived so far away she might as well live on the surface of the Sun. It wasn't meant to be.

There's no such thing as bear week.

2009-03-10T03:08:17-06:00

Have you been to a campground lately? Bears are the dirtbag, retired, semi-pro-wrestler or carnival strongman of nature. Seriously. He looks tough. He could probably beat up a drunk frat kid or rip a phone book in half. But let's be honest, you're going to wind up finding him in the morning, face down, in between some dumpsters. He'll look up and snarl loudly, but he's not scaring anyone. Silly bear.