Answers
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- I can explain!
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What Mom? This enormous red and purple bruise that takes up the entire left side of my neck? NO it's not a hickey! What the hell kind of gi…
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- What's your definition of "You've Got Some Explaining To Do?"
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If someone's accusing me in a vague and overbroad manner, I first ask them to define the situation and what I supposedly "did." W…
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- When in Doubt, Deny, Deny, DENY!!!
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Deny that you did it (I wasn't there, I wouldn't know how, it was a look-alike). No evidence is too strong to deny that it was you...u…
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- I can explain
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Oh, Alibis! I was drunk. I was half-asleep. I had zero balance on my phone. I was on drugs. I got carried away. My dog died. …
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- Let me explain.
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Oh! Do I ever! How do I craft an explanation that will appease everybody to whom I owe one? The caffeine makes me jumpy. I haven't …
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- Gee Honey, I Don't Know How I Wound Up In Bed With Robert Pattinson...
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So you see, honey, I was at this pub in town when I saw Robert Pattinson there, and you know it was just the strangest thing because when I wen…
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- I can explain
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Well, it's like this... first I tried, and then I gave up. I'm lazy. Whatcha gonna do about it?
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- I can explain
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I'm avoiding the swine flu (and you're a pig)
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- Sorry mom.
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I forgot to do the dishes because I was doing my homework when you called me. I then got off my butt and headed to the kitchen, only to be ambu…
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- The lesson to be learned? Always take the cookie.
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I was a good kid. Seriously. I never had a detention, got suspended or a Saturday school or even a paper pick-up. (Paper pick-ups were a de…
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- I can explain
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ppphhhfff, explaining? Please. Plan well and you never need to explain, and if all else fails, run.
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- MOVE! I need to use the bathroom
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explosive diarrhea, no one asks anything
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